(A Very Honest) What College Taught Me

My graduation day made me want to cry—but, not for the reason I thought it would. The ceremony was outdoors with no tent coverage whatsoever and I ended up swapping out my cute graduation dress and heeled sandals for boots that, unfortunately, I learned were not waterproof far too late, two pairs of socks, an old dress, raincoat and $2 poncho.

I spent the entire ceremony huddled under the girl next to me’s umbrella, shivering, complaining about the rain and willing this day to end. I was hoping the cap I’d carefully decorated wouldn’t be totally destroyed by the storm. I was feeling guilty for having my whole family and boyfriend sitting in the downpour (also not under a tent or any coverage) for hours but also part of me was glad they were sticking it out, too. I was furious at my college (now my alma matter!!!) for not being able to dole out money to buy tents when we all knew that, with an unwavering 100% chance for a week, it’d be raining on this day.

The commencement speaker was basically a guy bragging about all of his achievements in pharmaceutical discovery. It was the worst 15 minutes I’ve ever heard and I won’t even try to sugarcoat it! The valedictorian’s speech was thankfully brief and sweet. Senator Chuck Schumer, bless him, ripped his speech in half because it was cold and rainy and he knew how to read a room.

When I walked up to the stage, my drenched robe kept touching the back of my bare legs. I dodged worms and stepped in mud and shivered.

It was miserable. I left the ceremony before it was over and so did more than half of the graduates and their families. Total shit show.

But, thankfully, I decided to take faux-grad photos the day before because the weather was beautiful and we figured graduation day would be a nightmare.

And all of this brings me to the first thing college taught me…

1. You Can’t Control the Weather (But You Can Adapt & Bitch About it)

More than half of my senior week events and activities ended up being in the rain. One of them even faced a tornado!!! This doesn’t happen often or really at all in New York. Despite spending many senior events covered in mud and rain, they were all good times. While they could’ve been better had the sun been out, they were still memorable and wonderful. The weather can’t be controlled. All you can do is slip on a poncho and two pairs of socks and, for God’s sake, get some waterproof boots.

And you can bitch about it with your comrades. I made some new fans during graduation with my complaints and jokes, it was almost like a stand-up routine that no one asked for but (almost) everyone around me welcomed. Bitching and complaining have always helped me to create camaraderie with people who get my sense of humor. And you know what? I’m cool with it.

2. A Lot of People Will Just Be a Story in the Past

I probably won’t stay in touch with the vast majority of people I met in college. I know I won’t and I can’t. But I have memories of them (good and bad) and they’ll always be my stories to tell. It’s okay to let go of people and maybe you’ll cross paths with some of them. But if you don’t? Good or bad, they’re in the past. It’s okay because when you imagined you’d never make new friends in college, you did. And there are friends to be made after, too. Overall, don’t worry about trying to keep everyone. Sometimes you have people when you need them and it’s okay when those connections don’t last forever.

3. Videos are Precious

I regret taking so few videos while I was in college. The videos I have, drunk or sober, are so precious to me and never fail to make me laugh and smile. Halfway through my senior year, I started using Leap Second to record a second of every day and I love it so much and wish I’d done it sooner. I have lots of pictures, but more videos would’ve been chill, too.

4. Some Professors Will Become Friends (They Don’t Even Need to be Your Major)

I got drinks and tea with some professors and have plans to meet up with some for drinks this summer. Professors can transcend the line between professor and friend and it’s wonderful. They’ve left lasting impacts on me and I truly hope to stay in touch with all of them. They’re not even in my field of focus, but they’re still incredible and I never imagined I’d be so close with them.

Further Reading: How to Form Relationships with Professors

5. Find A Club You’re Passionate About & Stick With It 

Being part of and being a board member of the Student Programming Council (SPC) was something I will never forget. My club planned on-campus events and I ran social media. The club gave me leadership and extra purpose and it helped me make some amazing friends. I don’t regret being in just one club for four years because the other ones I dropped when I realized they weren’t something I passionately loved.

Further Reading: Guide to Joining Clubs in College

6. Don’t Let Being Single & in College Get to Your Head

Fall of sophomore year is one I’ll never forget. I was single! I was in college! I was finally able to exercise all of those shitty flirting and dating tips I’d excavated from Seventeen magazine and Cosmo in all of my years. But I ended up hurting feelings and feeling no feelings and just being sort of a wreck. I basically decided “You know what’d be fun? What if I tried to get a bunch of people to fall in love with me and want to date me and then didn’t date them or love them back!” You probably read that and was like “What kind of sociopathic narcissist would do that?” You’re right. It was not very nice of me and I wouldn’t recommend it. Being single and in college got to my head! And it can get in your head in a variety of ways on a spectrum ranging from “Forever Alone Sadness” to “Narcissistic Nutjob.”

Luckily, consider all of those lessons learned. Looking back on that semester, I’ve realized my self-worth and I’ve realized how far I’ve come when it comes to being honest, establishing boundaries and in general just being a better person.

7. A Lot of People Have One “Dark” Semester…But it Ends

Aforementioned was my dark semester. I still remember being dramatic as hell and crying on the stone ledge behind my housing. It might not have been a terrible part of my life, but I was not a great person and I’m glad I grew from it. It ended! Think of that dumb cliche phrase, “Grow through what you go through.” It’s not wrong.

When looking back on college, almost all of my friends can pinpoint at least one semester or even a few months where things were extra rough. And, you know what? It’s okay. I had no idea that I’d get a tattoo that semester and, shortly after (unrelated to the tattoo), meet my now-boyfriend.

8. Don’t Feel Guilty for Not Living the “Full College Experience”

By the end of college, I stopped with the FOMO. I didn’t give a shit if everyone was going out to the bar. I didn’t care if most of my grade was attending the annual wine mixer and wearing Lilly Pulitzer. I realized that my version of fun isn’t the same as everyone else’s and I will never regret missing out on being tipsy at a bar and bopping to music I despise.

I never had a fake ID and I didn’t go out very often, but I don’t regret it like I thought I would. It’s not my cup of tea and now, post-grad, I won’t miss being unable to take a few sips. Bottom line? If you’re not drinking every night and heading to bars, you’ll be just fine. And if you are? Just be careful and you’ll be fine, too.

My Senior Year College Bucket List was uniquely mine and, for the most part, checked off. I’m glad I prioritized what was important to me.

9. Time Flies

Duh. Everyone who graduates college will tell you this. I remember freshman year like yesterday and everything seems like it was just beginning. Don’t wish for time to fly faster and try to cherish it as much as you can. There won’t ever be another time in your life where you can get away with so much and live on so little.

10. Things Will Work Out Somehow

You won’t always get the internships you’d imagined. You might not have a job when you graduate. Maybe you’ll end up changing your major to something you’d never imagined. The road you’ll take isn’t one you’d imagined you would, but it will all work out and you’ll eventually reach your destination.